u r always on my mind

my late aunt on the far right. Its been 2 weeks but seem just like yeserday she left us.

i was clearing the data especially the photo booth folder.
didnt realize photos of my cousins' wedding are still there.
and chance upon the few photos of my late aunt.
on that wedding was the last time i met up with my aunt, she was so well then.

miss her, miss her kuih makmur, lopez and koci...
her loss would be greatly felt during syawal, being the eldest among her siblings, we never miss to visit her first.
not sure how it will be like this year......

back to the street, my boys..

after NKOTB era ended, BSB kept me alive..

lunch time entry

i cant go out for lunch since no one is in the office.
Lady A & G were out sending off our German client-N.
N came to see me to say his thanks for booking the hotel accomodation before he left.
He was pleased with the location, though my other collegues were giving negative comments when i told them that was my last resort.

He tried to strike a conversation on the first day he came here but as usual been the reserved type - i didnt even greeted him.
Only on the 3rd day, he then came calling my name in a very weird way saying that he had bought chocolate for all the trouble.
last minute and with a certain budget. I just hope he had not face much problem to be relocated to 4 different hotels in a week...

Thank Allah for his help- all went fine.

So i was posting the accouting entries while munching my brunch.
I purposely bought BK breakfast meal set so that i have something to munch in the afternoon. I had this feeling that i have to guard the office during lunch -very true.

told mak that i will be staying late to finish up my accounts.
Next week will be yet the beginning of another busy month...

and cant wait for Yati to come over next week, Mak would not be so tired with her around. and i can resume my hobby since someone is around to do the chores for me-YAY!!!

what else to say

stayed till 9.30pm for the payroll session. thank god, i have to account for only 8 staff, less complicated and straight forward.
i would have only 2 sessions left with Celes - GST & Month end closings. I am doing fine so far and she could tell that I am able to cope well. i too cant wait to manage the accounts smoothly and independently.

initially so many things to remember, days go by, all will come naturally.

when i reached home, both babies were asleep.
rest assure this arrangement will not last forever.
once im settled with the tasks, i could manipulate my time management and off duty on the dot.

oh yes! yesterday went to my cousin saini's baby shower - his 3rd gal.
met up with the rest of my extended families - uncle, aunties, brothers n sisters.
didnt expect to bump into them, thought they would have left ages ago.
went up to saini's homw together but i
didnt stay too long cos im going for the kenduri tahlil of my late aunt.

me & aisyah were in our crazy mood-
conversing in mandarin and we had a good laugh when we could not find the correct word!
thks channel 8 for all these years of informal mandarin lessons :-)

Latest of Glenn Medeiros

He's a teacher now, pursuing his PHD and this song he wrote for
"Timely and Inspirational Tune for NASA's Return to Flight 2005"

The video shows how beautiful Hawaii is...

humpty najmy

say cheeze everyone! i didnt know where to focus!!


Najmi had a great fall! he was as usual still unstable on his legs and fell with a loud thud on the floor.
I saw him smiling at the other end of the coffee table, he looked alrite, and continued reading the paper.
what caught my attention was my cousin's late father in law who passed away 3 days after my aunt.
his family had published the Al-fateha column on BH, he looked not quite close ti remembered him to be.

and so when i was recalling the day my cousin wed, seeing him on the wheel chair, I heard something and oops...Najmi was flat on the floor, mouth wide opened and cried when i screamed out 'JATUH'!!!

Mak scolded me for being careless and he didnt stop crying till i brought him down for a stroll for the 2nd time.
what a commotion. well..my fault, i admitted.

he must have been so tired that carrying him had never been so lighter.
he fell asleep in my arms and didnt realised i was making sounds to make him doze off. Pple looked at me with weird expressions.

later in the afternoon, i took pictures of the 3 of us infront of MAC, fun really.
Najmi forgotten he had fell, ezzaty taught me how to pose and i cant wait for both of them to have their naps!

my fave clip

someone posted glenn medeiros' live performance clip back in 1987 on you tube !!
i didnt get the chance to watch it then. remembered that his clips were rarely shown.
he was not a big name here, i guess. and NGCMLFY was only frequently aired towards 1990.

good looking right??! i realised he's much a better performer than Jordan K.

on my own

Lady Boss is not feeling well, so its been 2 days i had to make decisions for the smooth flow of the daily operation.

half of the morning yesterday I did room reservation for our client.
at such short notice, its hard to get good rates in good locations.
with many conventions being held at this time, almost all rooms are fully booked EXCEPT for the Deluxe suite, of course.

I was occupied with the Income Tax thingy, GST, etc that were left untouched by the previous staff. Its frustrating to be resourceful with no proper guidance.
Had to learn from scratch and like they said, having new things to learn is good BUT not when the deadline is just round the corner.

And the stocklist is patiently waiting for me to do the update...urgh!

better get going..My hearbeat is getting faster!

too late to say goodbye

what can i say? no perfect words could ever describe my guilt.

on Monday, i got a phonecall from kak nia that her mum - my eldest aunt was hospitalised.
this would be her 2nd time, exactly a year ago when she was first diagnosed with pneumonia.
was so busy with work & class, i didnt give much thought how serious her condition would be.
cos i know she would be okay.

Told mak about this, and she planned to visit the next day, which she had failed to do so apparently because of me, coped up with work and no one to send her there.
On Wednesday, Kak nia smsed to inform Aunt was critically ill and unconscious.
Again, no one to send Mak there, she delayed and only visited her on Thursday with the rest of the family EXCEPT ME.
Thinking that i would skip lesson or at least drop by after lesson but somehow, I was not meant to meet her alive.
All were puzzled why i didnt turn up..i could not answer that myself.

Deep in my heart, I had this feeling that my Aunt would be allright-admist all the negative feedback form the doctors.

I went home straight after class, never even think of visiting her that Thursday nite, the night my aunt was given few hours to be alive before meeting HIM. somehow before i slept, i had this urge to recite the Yassin for her. i never read so long a surah before going to bed. I though it would the best to compensate my absence. nothing could ever can pay for that precious moment.

I was all prepared to visit her on Friday night, cancelling my training hours with Celes, I even brought kitab Yassin with me.
IT WAS TOO LATE, she had gone to meet HIM at 9.00 am. I took urgent leave, dont bother to ask my Exec Director, the reason she called me up, before she had the chance to say anything, told her im going home now for a funeral.

I cried, all shaken when I saw my aunt lying motionless for the burial ceremony. My knees were knocking with each other, I just could not control my tears and the emotion burst out shamefully. I took the last chance to kiss her forehead and lay my face on her chest after all her children had their turns, I must not let that chance to slip, or else im gonna regret it for my life. which i already had.

She was as if in deep sleep, no signs of pain or suffering and to this day, I never felt she had gone forever.
she had always been so quiet and you just know she would be around for all occasions .

May Her soul be placed amongst the Righteous.
AL-FATEHA. buat Hajjah Halimah.
OBEK, kehadiran mu akan senantiasa dirindui, pemergianmu aku tangisi.
pergimu terlalu cepat buat kami yang menyayangimu.
Moga ROH mu tenang disana.

Belum sempat aku mohon maaf diatas keterlanjuran/kesilapanku
Belum sempat aku memeluk dan mendakapmu
Terkilan sungguh atas kelalaianku untuk menjengokmu,
Hanya kiriman doa dan alfateha yg dpt ku beri.
Insya-Allah, silaturrahim dgn anak2 mu akan ku pelihara diatas ingatan abadiku kepada mu.

missing

I was like waiting for a star to fall for the past weeks, hoping eagerly with high anticipation. Days went by, I leave it to Fate.

Just 2 days starting on this new role, I received not less than 5 calls asking me to meet up because I was shortlsited. should I go or stay put?

I heeded Mak's advice to accept which ever first to offer and letting go the rest.
Though, those calls were from well known organisations - from banks to retail dealers.

Afterall, I was only invited for interviews - GOD knows how many shortlisted candidates that have been called up.

I have got so much to learn and like i have posted in my earlier entry, this is the post that i hope both of us could compromise. Yeah, the accounts here are much simpler from the previous, adding on administrative and HR duties.

Definitely a multi tasker.(somehow i hate the calling up part)

BTW, i was informed by AL that SL & YL had left too.
leaving without words. i hope to see them soon, i really have fond memories of both of them.

we shared, we cared, we helped - they were so thoughtful. im gonna miss them.
in fact i missing them already

losing that M for everything NEW

im losing interest in reading up my notes.
Im not studying enough.
Im not revising sufficiently.
Im not focusing.
Im so very lazy.
Im not supposed to be like this, especially when exam is 2 days away.
This is so not me.

Im so de-Motivated.
IF is SO boring. IF is so technical and factual. URGH!!
I have done well for the past 4 papers, not letting this one to smear the good record.
Dont care about scoring another A, a pass will do!!!!

Good news though, Im starting a new day tomorrow.
First day Im sending Ezzaty to school from tomorrow onwards, before reporting for work - new boss, new office, new title, new colleagues, new challenges but old area.

barely 4 months - what to do.
A NEW DAY HAS COME, moving on and i hope it would be for the last time.

mushy birthday bash

the emotional birthday boy!

3 princesses

overwhelmed by the attention

had to delay the celebration cos the cake had not arrived till it was 3pm.
and Nami was soundly asleep.
we were very hungry, its already lunch time and we could not wait for Alia.
so we ate up the satays which Twinny had ordered.

The moment Najmi woke up, we sang him a birthday song and served him the cake.
I think he was still very much sleepy..!!

just another day

IF paper is around the corner, I have got less than 10 days to revise.
for my case, its more to understand. pray for another miracle, just what happened to Econs.
at the last hour, i could then understood and made my way through to score-didnt expect to do well myself.

so God, please help me through this paper too, kind assistance in understanding the facts and attempt the right questions.
3 hours is not that long - pondering leaves little to write down the facts.

okay, tomorrow shall be another gathering with my sisters to celebrate Najmi's belated birthday.
no fuss at all cos Najmi has no idea what is birthday all about, making my task easier - to buy d cake.
no theme or fancy request from him. as long as we have a cake to highlight the celebration.

no decorations, no balloons, no games, no special appetizer..
will see how it goes tomorrow.

Ezzaty & Mun are busy right now painting one wall.
and im keeping myself busy on not important stuff - like updating this entry!

see ya!